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Attachment Theory: An Introduction
Have you heard that old advice: "It doesn't really matter, a baby won't remember that anyway"? It's ok, the baby won't remember being separated from you after birth. Don't fret, a baby won't remember crying alone in the crib for an hour or two. Don't worry, the baby won't remember that you left for that weekend getaway. Well, research has shown that while the baby may not consciously remember those moments of separation, they will affect her. How we interact with our newborns does matter, and, in fact, it matters a great deal.
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Attachment Parenting: How We Got There
These are some things I believed about myself and my children before I became a mom: I would breastfeed on a schedule, for my children needed to adhere to my routines and schedule. My children would sleep in our room for a short time, then sleep in their own room, and we would sleep-train them to sleep through the night. My children would never be allowed in on our bed, for our bed was sacred. I would discipline my children firmly and physically when needed. Then, I became a mom. My children were breastfed on demand their first year of life and well beyond. My children slept in our…
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On Greeting our Children and Becoming a Better Parent
Confession: There are times when I parent poorly. There are times when I put my needs ahead of my children’s needs. There are times when I’m more interested in what’s on Instagram than I am in my own kids. There are times when I allow my frustration with them to lead me to say harsh words that harm them. There are times I ignore them, and in doing so, devalue them. I am not a perfect parent. I make mistakes. And there are times when I hurt our relationship by how I treat them. I am guilty of this sad reality. I think, at some point, we all are.…
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Co-Sleeping: FAQs
If you would have told me five years ago that we would wake up in bed with two toddlers, I would have laughed, then probably cried. Our bed was a sacred space for the two of us; a place where we found a safe haven when we were at our most vulnerable, a place of rest and rejuvenation. It was not a place for little children. Or so I thought. We are a Co-Sleeping Family Co-sleeping (more specifically, bed-sharing) became extremely valuable for us because our firstborn was not what people would call a “good sleeper.” His frequent nighttime wakings and our decision not to sleep-train is ultimately what led…
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Co-Sleeping: How To
Before we had kids, Kevin asked me, “What would you say about our future kids sleeping in bed with us?” I scoffed. “Never happening.” “Really?” he asked. “Why?” I went onto explain that I wasn’t allowed to sleep in my parents’ bed. I would sneak into their room and my Dad, who is a light sleeper, would compassionately give me advice and send me back to my room. Children just weren’t to be in their parents’ bed. Kevin, on the other hand, was often welcomed into his parents’ full-sized bed whenever he had trouble sleeping. “I always felt so safe between them,” he recounted dreamily. “Well,” I said, “That’s cute.…
